What is Hashtag Basic?

Unless you've been living under a rock, you probably have heard the term 'basic' or it's more prevalent incarnation; 'basic bitch' applied to someone, usually someone you're not a big fan of. I think 'basic' stretches to much more than pumpkin spiced latte's and Cosmo tips. Sadly, it probably applies to most if not all millenials. As someone born in 1984 (there I said it), I was born kind of on the cusp, and don't really know where to place myself. The generation before me was awesome; Gen-X? Everything Portlandia is nostalgic about? Yeah great. Grunge music, clown college, contentment at being unambitious, sleeping until 11...ok now I'm just playing the theme song in my head. Then came us...people born in the early-mid 80's. I think they called us Gen-Y because there was no term for us, and we really didn't have a place in this world. On that logic, I would say millenials are anyone born in 1990 and up. The reasoning for this being, those of us that came into this world in the decade preceding it remember a lot of shit that seems totally foreign to let's say...Kendall Jenner (ps, if you follow her on Instagram, you're basic). Ask her to dial a rotary phone. I bet you it would be hilarious. 

Mean Girls ...porn for Basic Bitches

The millenial generation is one of entitlement. It's very much the me-me-me generation. Selfies were born from technology made for millenials, and as much as Mark Zuckerberg himself is not a millenial, Facebook is definitely a product for them; those starved for attention and a need to broadcast almost everything. 

I remember newspapers, I remember internet cafés, phone books, caller ID, etc. That doesn't mean I'm not basic. I don't follow Kendall, but I do follow Gigi Hadid, and yes I use Instagram for selfies. Crucify me. I think basic stretches beyond going to Coachella rather than the Met Opera House, reading Cosmo instead of The New York Times, and pumpkin everything. 

Going back to my generation, if I could label it ANYTHING, it would be the Fucked Generation. We really were. By the time most of us graduated college, the economy was lodged in the toilet, and a year later it had been flushed down along with many hopes and dreams. We overpaid for our overpriced education so we could have a degree from an elite school that no one deems anything more than 'fancy degrees', and no amount of Instagram selfies, viral videos, or followers on Pinterest were going to save us. Tuition was at an all time high, and employment was at an all time low. A lot of us took jobs that we were way too good for with hardly any salary, but I digress. 

I think this excludes us from being basic because we have more important shit right now, and a lot of us (myself excluded because fuck it) are raising families and have no time to think of the perfect hashtag...I remember when that was just called a pound sign yeesh. 

Entitlement is not in our blood because we had to scrap for everything in adult life. We thereby have some sense of dignity. Living in the epicenter of the tech capital, Silicon Valley I'm subject to a lot of basic. It's more of a generational thing than a lifestyle thing. And by the way, if you're a hipster who brews their own beer, and only drinks PBR because you think you know what 'bourgeoise' means...guess what you're BASIC. And stop throwing around the term 'artisanal' like you give a shit. Who cares if the coffee comes from a ridiculous contraption at a corner store in Brooklyn hand pressed for 3 hours by some tattoo'd 40-year-old who loves being a professional barista or from a Bodega on Crenshaw, just drink it.

An artisanal basic bitch hipster, who dresses like a hobo but has a trust fund and spends all of his money on anachronistic Sherlock Holmes pipes. And those mom jeans? 400$.

I am aware I'm coming off like I'm saying that I did things before they were cool, which is the ultimate hipster battle cry, but in my various interactions, I'm lucky not to have choked on too much basic. Once in a while, I stumble upon a basic bitch who tells me that she went to Coachella because she got to dress up all 'bohemian and stuff'. And it hurts my heart. 

Side note: I especially hate how Taylor Swift who's latest album breaks records every day (or used to) called it 1989 even though she spent 5 days in 1989. As if to escape from her basicness. That's an insult to everyone who was actually born in the 80's. 1989? Really? Did ya see the Berlin Wall come down? Didn't think so. Stop trying to resurrect an era you know nothing about. And your music videos are basic AF, just so you know.

Yes, I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when this happened. Do you? Or did you watch it on The People vs. OJ Simpson?

So before you go on how you 'can't even', remember that there were people whom you call 'old' who are in their 30's now who remember a time when they had so much student debt that they couldn't even, and that was an actual struggle. I'm reminded of the Louis CK joke about how people in their 20's stand around thinking if they just stand around and hate their job someone will appear and be like 'well let's make you a director then, that's how that works'. And no I don't want to go wine tasting with you. I know you make more money than I do, but I've been to Italy, and to France, and to Napa, and I know the difference between a Bordeaux and a Burgundy. Unless you're paying. So if you're reading this, and you're basic, get your butt back on Pinterest. Those weddings to your imaginary boyfriend yet aren't going to plan themselves. Oooof, that was a lot of shade but I do feel better. 

Below clips to better illustrate my point:

TV's Reign of Delicious Fucked-Upedness

Jessica Lange in American Horror Story: Freakshow. Fabulous.

Scream Queens, Scandal, and How To Get Away With Murder. No it's not a retrospective on the 90's, it's some of TV's most successful shows. Let's get down to business. We all watched the Emmy's we know who wins all of the awards, but TV is all about ratings in the end isn't it? With the TV renaissance appearing to be nearing its tail-end, there are those who grasped the medium and refuse to let go without a fight. Mad Men is over, Breaking Bad is over, Downton Abbey...you get the idea. Now, if we could just get Girls to wrap up quietly, we'll be great! We're left with two major camps who dominate in ratings and have given us a specific point of view and auteur-like quality to their bastion of shows. 

In one corner we have the incomparable Shonda Rhimes; the brainchild behind Grey's Anatomy, Scandal, and most recently How to Get Away with Murder, a problematic and I'll say sometimes laughably outlandish show, but it did win Viola Davis her history-making Emmy, proving that Shonda is a solid force to be reckoned with in the TV industry. 

In the other corner we have a creative team the likes of which I haven't seen since Damon Lindelof and Carlton Cuse; Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk who have proved versatile in genres including both comedy and horror with shows like Glee, Nip/Tuck, and American Horror Story, their marriage of the two genres culminating with the recently premiered, Scream Queens. 

Emma Roberts in Scream Queens, previously of AHS fame and Ryan Murphy's current muse.

Both of these camps have a clear cut voice and vision, and their shows, although niche, are widely popular to the point where you'll tune in just because you heard that Shonda is exec producer on something, regardless of content. The age of shows that take themselves very, almost too seriously are over. And we've ushered in the age of highly imaginative content and wildly outlandish premises and characters. I would say that both Shonda and Murphy/Falchuk are very camp in their approach. In the immortal words of Blanche Dubois; 'I don't want realism, I want magic', and that's just what shows like Scandal and American Horror Story provide. Both teams provide a hyperactive reality and prefer style over accuracy. It's actually a genius strategy. Let's take Shonda. There are already countless courtroom and political drama shows that are in syndication and still airing on television. How do you go around that? Make the premise totally implausible and put as many twists and turns imaginable in it. It's so much more fun when you don't adhere to any rules except your own. Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington), the epicenter of Scandal is a feminist and television icon by now. We can forget that every situation she finds herself in is highly unlikely to happen in actuality, but who cares? There's no limits to the creative imagination and that's what both camps have proven. 

Olivia and President Fitz; the love story that we are all talking about and yet totally implausible and highly imaginative. 

Murphy and Falchuk have really grown to impress. Nip/Tuck was campy but it was ridiculous. And who wants to see a scripted show about plastic surgeons when we can see it on E!'s Botched for real? Glee, I wasn't the biggest fan of, perhaps because I couldn't stand its fan base...the Gleeks. Let's face it, that show was just pretty people in a kareoke bar without the booze. But they totally redeemed themselves with American Horror Story which has the inventive bravado of a show like Lost. It's completely implausible, and very unrealistic, but honestly how much does that matter? Were we all on board with secret hatches, black smoke monsters and time travel on a mysterious island? Yes we were. 

The highly anticipated new season of American Horror Story (Hotel) will feature Lady Gaga as a member of the principle cast. And when we all heard about this we collectively lost our shit. 

Scream Queens, their latest endeavor, had a brilliant premiere and seems to marry both Murphy's and Falchuk's penchant for horror with their fabulous nose for comic timing. Both camps also share something with every successful show right now and that is a multi-protagonist show. A la Lost, both Scandal and Scream Queens, Grey's Anatomy and American Horror Story have well over 10 main characters, and aren't afraid to kill anyone off. If you have 20 people in the main cast, you have more freedom to end their trajectory without losing your audience, because there are 19 left to keep the story moving. 

Viola Davis, star of How to Get Away with Murder and the show's creator Shonda Rhimes. 

We have to admit that at this point, each teams plethora of shows kind of bleed into each other. We can see parallels and similarities between Scandal and How to Get Away with Murder, just like we can see them between AHS and Scream Queens, but when you have that much content and that many active shows, how can you not use your powers as a storyteller to create a distinct voice that resonates through all of your work? That's the mark of an auteur after all. 

The new TGIT campaign really says it all. We don't have to roll up our sleeves and sit among the most self-righteous tv snobs for an hour of Breaking Bad where a general bleakness and way over-the-top deaths married with an existential darkness dominating the premise. We can pour ourselves a comically large glass of wine and have fun with our friends who take no shame in totally believing what is happening on Scandal. 

Banner for the current TGIT fall campaign.

I for one, believe that this is a brilliant time for TV, where anything goes. Yes, it can be a 'drama' but it doesn't have to be bleak, and serious, and harsh. Most of us watch TV for a break from our lives, we yearn for the unrealistic; the magical. I just finished yet another Buzzfeed countdown, this one about some of the greatest one-liners on the premiere of Scream Queens. None of them are anything you'll ever ever EVER hear in real life, and all of them totally ridiculous, but they are hilarious and genius. Where else are you going to hear 'good evening, idiot hookers.' Probably on Vanderpump Rules, but hey at least this one is scripted. With based-on-real-events shows like Masters of Sex and Halt and Catch Fire tanking, we can see that it's not what the viewing public hungers for anymore. 

With the most recent Emmy's, it's been proven that a show that doesn't take itself too seriously can still be taken seriously as something of worth, and that's the genius of both Rhimes and Murphy/Falchuk. I don't think any of them set out to write shows that garner awards, in fact they are usually the kind of shows that don't. But ratings don't lie, and now award shows are catching up to the trend. As should you. I've mentioned a lot of shows in this blog post, if you don't watch at least one of them, well you're not a very good person. So get on that. Please and thank you. 

Below the new TGIT campaign.