'Southern Charm' Translates Into Day Drinking and General Philandering

The cast of Southern Charm, the only way you can tell this doesn't take place in Beverly Hills is that they are in a southern style mansion (or set) and the men are wearing three piece suits.

Bravo has definitely bled the Los Angeles area dry with all of their reality garbage from the OG Real Housewives of the OC to The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, to Vanderpump Rules, to Shahs of Sunset to...you know fuck it. But then they remembered that one of the most popular series of their Real Housewives franchise was the one in Atlanta bitches. So they decided to take that private jet with Andy Cohen's face on the sie of it back to the south and this time plant it in one of the oldest city in our sad little country; Charleston. A city I was only aware of after watching Gone With the Wind (1939). 

A Southern Gentleman...why? Because he's sitting on a yacht. 

In actuality, Charleston is steeped in an amazing history. They've kind of been in hibernation since they were founded back in the day (1600's) and live by those same principals (slavery and blatant racism aside). The Southern gentleman for the men, the Southern Belle for the ladies, the coming out parties, the mint juleps, sounds quite awesome honestly. Also, it's a beautiful place, you know from pictures I've seen. 

So this show is about rich people in Charleston, just like every other reality show on Bravo is about rich people, mostly in the Los Angeles metropolitan area, but this time it's pretty cool. It's like the new money of Beverly Hills meets the old standards and mannerisms of England that the settlers brought with them to the good ol' south. 

A real Southern gentleman. The British, Leslie Howard. 

I just remember it being hilarious and wonderfully ironic that in Gone with the Wind (1939) that takes place largely in and outside of Charleston, the iconic 'Southern Gentleman' character is played by the English actor Leslie Howard, because lets face it, there's really nothing gentlemanly about the Southern Gentleman for like forever now. They all have what one girl on the show described as perpetual Peter Pan Syndrome, and that's what we all look for in a man isn't it ladies? It's 10am and their pouring themselves a stiff whiskey with a twist while they adjust their tie for the polo match where they'll eventually drunkenly hit on your best friend right in front of you. As it's so eloquently put in the trailer; 'here in Charleston, they'll say 'bless your heart' and turn around and stab you in the back'. So now we get to look forward to old money making jackasses out of themselves, rather than new money doing that which is just so much more fun isn't it? And aside from the geography, that's basically the only difference between this show and everything else in the Bravo shit cannon. So happy watching! 

Let's See How Times Have Changed Since the Death of Kurt Cobain.

'I'm a loser baby, so why don't you kill me?'

I remember watching a documentary about years in the style of Behind the Music which started with a music journalist saying that '1994 was the beginning of some seriously shallow times', and has it yet ended. Have we gone back to that golden age which we briefly grasped on to in the early 90's? Probably not. It's a question of artifice vs. the genuine. And it seems like artifice is winning and not in the good way where rebellion against the 'truth' of the late 60's which was chalk full of hypocrisy was replaced by glitter, glam, and unapologetic facade culture of the 70's, where disco ruled, men wore fingernail polish, and cocaine was all the rage. 

Perhaps one of the most disgusting manifestations of the new millenium is the rise of the hipster. 

But let's go back to 1994. It was the pinnacle year that defined that decade really. I remember one of the more recent episodes of Parks and Recreation where Leslie Knope in her 'over the top' fashion decides to throw her husband the best themed birthday party ever, and considering his favorite time period was the EARLY 90's which is always emphasized. Therefore, there's R.E.M. playing everywhere, Ann dresses as Blossom and Ben is seen sporting his favorite Letters to Cleo t-shirt. Why is the 'early' part of that decade emphasized? Because I don't think Ben or any of us were fans of the 'late' 90's. With Aqua, Chumbawamba, and the Spice Girls topping the charts, heroin chic being the standard of thinness that women had to aspire to, and Titanic (1997) about to break every box office record ever set, it was not a time to look forward to or to remember fondly. 

Perhaps one of the worst moments of the 90's. 

I suppose that when Kurt Cobain died in April of 1994, he took the idealism, merit, and spirit (no pun intended) of the early part of that decade with him. Just like when the free concert featuring The Rolling Stones in Altamont in 1969 was the death nail of 60's. It's like he knew he had his brief moment in the sun and the rest of time he just wouldn't fit into nor wanted to be a part of. 

Now almost exactly 20 years after his death, we have not taken any lessons of those magical few years with us. We are now the technological revolution, where 22 year olds become billionaires in a matter of months by inventing Facebook, everyone in the world stares at their smartphones while walking into oncoming traffic not giving a shit, and every single person spends their days, even if unemployed , hunched over a computer screen. 

If we really examine it, what's missing the most is original content of popular culture. Everything is as Edward Norton eloquently put it in a film I love to hate (Fight Club (1999)); a copy of a copy of a copy. Every song is a remix or a sample of something that came before it, every film is either a remake or a reboot or a running franchise of a book that probably was published only a year prior. It's very basic. We've run out of ideas. Cobain's perhaps most poignant lesson was that of celebrity. The word 'celebrity comes from the idea of celebrating someone obviously. And now that we have things like 'celebutantes' 'internet celebrities' and 'reality celebrities' it's really quite depressing if we truly examine in. Why is it that we celebrate these people? Because they have a litter of children? Because they have an insane amount of plastic surgery? Because they are able to be famous without actually doing anything? The latter rhetorical question perhaps being the most important. Cobain came from an age where not only did you have to be able to do something well, you had to have something new to say, and have to be able to reach everyone on a gut level rather than a 'oh, that's fun' level. 

A picture worth a thousand words

And perhaps our gut level doesn't even exist anymore. We've packed it so tightly with fluff like Bravo, designer handbags, and Seth Rogen movies that we can't tell nor do we care if we even like it or not. We eat it up. It's the fast food of the soul. And the soul devours it with pleasure because the soul has lost all sense of self. A person isn't a person anymore, he/she is a franchise, a commodity. We have transitioned from being human to being in a state of the 'post-human'. We live our lives out on the internet and tell our inner most thoughts to our blogs and twitter feeds. And the saddest end to all of this is that there is no end in sight. The problem doesn't seem like there will be a rebellion of 'the genuine' any time soon because we are all basically hypnotized by the 'hyper-real' or 'the meta', that we don't care if we die tomorrow, because we know that our death wouldn't have an impact on culture like Cobain's did. Because let's face it, people are so ADD that they'll hear it, and just go on with their day, but not before posting some pseudo-profound 140 character poem about it on Twitter. 

Below is the documentary I was telling  you about it's only 20 minutes long, I highly recommend watching it. 

Wallace Berman (LA-Based Experimental Filmmaker) at Home at the Anthology.

His wife was the posterchild (literally) for the Semina movement

Back in the day, when dinasaurs romaed the earth I had a gig at the Washington Square News as a staff writer. So I'm doing what I do every morning and lookin up birthdays/anniversaries and it turns out that it's one of my favorite influences' birthday; Wallace Berman, more of an artist than a filmmaker, his 'Semina' movement was quite unique. Anyway, I tried to find that article that I wrote when his films cames to The Anthology Film Archives back in 2007 and I went to review it, in the archives of the news paper, but notices that I had saved it as a word document on my computer just in case I might every need it for anything...like this. So here it is:

Berman at home with hi children.

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Berman art at home at Anthology

Vera Ryzhik

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Published: Thursday, February 8, 2007

Updated: Saturday, September 6, 2008

Ginsberg, Kerouac and Cassady - it's difficult to disregard the artistic legacy left by the Beat Generation.

Although those names are associated primarily with the New York Beats, an autonomous beat community also existed in Los Angeles: Photographer, filmmaker and poet Wallace Berman was a key figure. In conjunction with NYU's Grey Art Gallery and the exhibition "Semina Culture: Wallace Berman and His Circle,"

Anthology Film Archives is running "Semina Cinema," a series devoted to Berman and his contemporaries.

Like most films of the Anthology, the series contains rarities and treasures of the avant-garde movement that are unlikely to appear anywhere else. Works by counterculture figures such as Bruce Conner, Stan Brakhage,

Andy Warhol and Taylor Mead provide a window into the times and art of a complex bohemian movement.

Berman himself, though famous for his photography and collages, had a strong connection with the avantgarde film movement of the '50s and '60s.

Andrew Lampert, film archivist for the Anthology and programmer for this series, calls Berman a "causal link" between the different mediums utilized in the movement. The series becomes a link in itself between

Berman and his contributions to filmmaking - his only film, "Aleph," is the centerpiece of the series. It's accompanied by a collection of 28 minutes of lost footage that didn't make it into the film, brought in by his son and appropriately titled "Artifactual: Films from the Wallace Berman Collection."

Never officially released, Berman would run this footage for friends, projecting it on his refrigerator. Screening exclusively tonight for the premiere, a new negative of "Aleph" will be accompanied by a live performance from prolific jazz composer John Zorn and his band. Friday, prominent beat artist and "Warhol superstar"

Taylor Mead will introduce the companion pieces "My Home Movies," shot by Taylor, and the film "Tarzan

and Jane Regained ... Sort Of." If you're looking to try to fathom Warhol, this series is a great way to start.

Every generation needs to reflect on its predecessors. And for a generation lacking an artistic renaissance, this series should be a revelation. Berman remains one of the most important figures not only in the L.A.-based beat community, but also in the history of counterculture. Aside from his art, he founded Semina (literally

"Outsider Art"), a privately run publication he headed to generate interest in his and his contemporaries' art.

Still from one of his films called 'Her', yes there is another film by that name. And it's better. 

An artist's artist, Berman worked outside the marketplace, considering art a personal pursuit rather than a business - an ideal Lampert claims has faded in today's culture.

"He provided a social, artistic and literary space in California for these innovative and unusual people to meet each other, to mingle with experimental artists from elsewhere and to express ideas not common in America during those years," said Shelley Rice, a Tisch photography professor. In addition to his photography, Berman pioneered collaging, which became the essence of the art Warhol would later popularize. As part of Semina culture, Berman's work should fit in perfectly at the Anthology.

"It makes sense to have it here," Lampert said of Berman's place in the series. "It's about time." • Starts today and ends Sunday at Anthology Film Archives. Live musical accompaniment by John Zorn tonight at 8 p.m.; Taylor Mead introduces his films at Friday's program, also at 8 p.m.

Carlton is My New Favorite, Joyce is a Moron, and Kyle is Playing Her Last Card in the Deck

The two new additions to the Housewives. Joyce on the left and Carlton on the right.

Anyone catch last night's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills? It was a doozy. It aired in between two nauseating episodes of Vanderpump Rules where we basically find out that everyone who works at SUR cheats on their significant other. Let me break that down for ya real quick; Jax cheated on Stassi with Kristen who is Tom's girlfriend who cheated on Kristen with Arianna. So it's just a giant clusterfuck of regret and denial that culminates with everyone comically borrowing other people's phones to find salacious texts as evidence (especially Tom) poor guy, he has to go through Jax's phone to find proof that his girl (horseface) hasn't been loyal to him and when Jax points out that he cheated on her too, his retort is '...not with a fucking friend dude'. Oh god what interesting lives they lead. 

I heart Carlton!

Anyway, back to the Housewives! This new season has been rather uneventful and boring to say the least, just a bunch of glammed up parties, and casting two totally out of place housewives, I guess because they're brunette (gasp) and at first I was like 'what is this? I miss hotmess Taylor and backstabber Adrienne!' but now I totally understand the casting choices of bringing in former Miss Puerto Rico who can barely speak English properly and another Brit for Lisa to hang out with; my personal favorite, Wiccan Carlton Gebbia. And when I say Wiccan it's not just a bunch of bright candles and incense in her mansion, she does the works. Her house has so many Wiccan and also, strangely enough Christian iconography in it, it feels like a mediaeval castle fighting with itself. But it's awesome, I'd move in tomorrow. 

Also, did I mention Carlton's a freak? She has three small children and still goes to that naughty lingerie shop near the Beverly Center (yes I have membership there) to try on the craziest psuedo-S&M; black leather inspired costumes and has an entire room dedicated to freaky sex. The bedroom she uses for 'regular' sex, like to-make-baby sex. But the room with mirrors all around the walls and on the ceiling, that's where the sex swing goes. 

Kyle: Is that a Jewish Star?
Carlton: Are you fucking kidding me?

So she had this extravaganza to celebrate America (I still don't get why, it wasn't 4th of July and she's British) but anyway she had just gotten a tattoo of a pentagram on the back of her neck, very sexy actually nothing too gaudy. Kyle the 'Jewish one' just because she married a Jewish man and went to a couple Kabbalah classes while it was cool takes one look at it and says 'is that the Jewish star?' to which Carlton excellently replies 'are you fucking kidding me?' which is exactly what I was screaming at the TV that very moment. 

Carlton's tattoo that caused all the ruckus. 

First of all, only non-Jews call the Star of David a 'Jewish star', second of all, if you can't tell the difference between a FIVE POINTED Pentagram and a SIX POINTED Star of David, honey go back to Rabbinical school and study. This lead to inescapable tension at the next party (yeah, all they do is party and plan parties, get used to it). It's two of the husbands' birthdays, and it's a sit down dinner and Kyle gets a little WASTED and starts going off on Carlton who is already on the defensive. And then she pulls that card that you never pull unless you plan on having no further relationship with the other person. For Carlton's totally appropriate reaction to Kyle not knowing the difference between a pentagram and a Star of David, Kyle calls Carlton an anti-semite. Wayyyyy wrong thing to do there Kyle. Also she added 'you don't want people to judge you being Wiccan then don't act like a witch!' After which point, instead of casting a horrible spell on her (something empty headed Joyce accused Carlton of earlier) Carlton calmly excuses herself and leaves. Good girl. Hey Kyle, how about this, you want to call yourself Jewish? Then do your damn research and stop acting like a moron. Btdubs, that goes for you too Joyce, as Carlton put it; I know English is your second goddamn language but you've got to stop throwing around accusations too (i.e. calling Brandi a racist). I mean it seems like when these women know they've been argued in a corner their last card to play is to j'accuse the other person of being basically the worst thing you can be when we all know that not to be the case. Shame on you Kyle and Joyce. I know one of you was a child star and the other one was a beauty queen (respectively) and neither of you went to college, but for the love of god, stop showing that off by what you say. It's embarrassing. 

My Top 10 Films Directed By Women

I was inspired by this article: Top 100 Movies of All Time… By Female Directors and also a facebook thread I started a while back that I now can't find where I asked everyone to write a female director to see if we could make it to 100. And we made it well past 100. We all know filmmaking is the boy's club, but some of the best filmmakers out there right now and in the past are women. Trailblazers, innovators, theorists, and originals most of all, here are my top 10 films directed by the gentler sex. 

1. Meshes of the Afternoon (Maya Deren) 1943

2. La Souriante Madame Beudet (Germaine Dulac) 1923

3. The Hitch-Hiker (Ida Lupino) 1953 

4. Orlando (Sally Potter) 1992

5. The Piano (Jane Campion) 1993 

6. Boys Don't Cry (Kimberly Peirce) 1999

7. American Psycho (Mary Harron) 2000

8. At Land (Maya Deren) 1944

9. Fat Girl (Catherine Breillat) 2001

Fish Tank (Andrea Arnold) 2009

Honorable mentions below: