Tuesday, November 13, 2012

Real Housewives of the Most Famous Zip Code in the World Premieres for It's 3rd Season

Still from Bravo's promo for the 3rd season featuring(L to R) Kyle Richards, Brandi Glanville, and Lisa Vanderpump. Beverly Hills is about to get cold, bitches.

Well bitches, it's official. My ultimate favorite show is alive and well at the Bravo network. After the balls-to-the-wall insanity of the last season even execs like Andy Cohen were taking a long hard look in the mirror to make the decision as to bring it back. But nothing, I mean nothing deters the trajectory of Bravo's campiest TV show. Not even death. And quite honestly now that Russell is dead and buried there is a lot less awkwardness to the whole atmosphere.
There are a couple of new additions and subtractions to take note of. America's most hated housewife and now the one who's side we're all on, Camille Grammer is out of the loop, but considering tv spots for the season, looks like she does show up for some good old fashioned passive aggressive catiness.
Filling her silicon-enhanced shoes is Brandi Glanville, officially my favorite Real Housewife and she's only been on as a regular for two episodes. You might remember her from last season, she hobbled on the scene in crutches and completely sans filter. A former model, and newly divorced she had a mouth on her that none of the housewives appreciated at first, but that's because they all love acting pretentious. Anyway, Brandi is by far the hottest, youngest, and tallest of the bunch, and all though somewhat hairbrained, clearly eons more mature than most of them. 
It's revealed that Paul Nassif, Adrienne's now ex-husband calls Brandi a bitch to her face and she is not happy about it. She's already proven that where she goes, the drama goes, but so do the ratings so more power to her.
Another addition is the ice queen herself, or at least someone that looks like the human manifestation of it; Yolanda Foster. She looks like a cross between an extra from a Broadway revival of Cats, Leonna Helmsley, and what every American imagines every Swedish woman looks like. The irony of it being, she's Dutch. Anyway, she seems to be somewhat of a clever kitty with a kind of quiet and insidious nature. But I have a feeling that although rather boring as of now, eventually we'll all be taking her side. She's definitely the 'observer' of the group. 

Thanks to the wonderful world of celebrity-blogging, we are all now well aware of Adrienne's split from husband Paul Nassif, which quite honestly was a shocker when we all first heard about it considering they had what seemed to be the most solid relationship in that she told him what to do and he complied, but it will still be fun in a sick way to find out exactly what happens, the uglier the better.
Aside from that, here's shit that's been going down within the group. Lisa Vanderpump and frenemy Adrienne Maloof no longer speak to each other or live across the road from each other, and in Beverly Hills once you move mansions to get away from someone else you're pretty much dunzo. Taylor is 10 pounds heavier (something she does not stop repeating) sans abusive deranged husband, and using way too much beige lipstick, but still kicking. Kim Richards is sober and very awkwardly so. She's definitely in that stage of sobriety where you hate everything and can't stand to be around anybody so you kick the cat when you come home every night. I don't know about you, but I miss the old crazypants Kim. Kyle is trying to shed her mean girl reputation which she built up beautifully last season and is focusing on her ridiculously perfect family making us all hate her anyway. Everyone is still filthy rich despite the recession, insider trading scandals, houses burning down, and market crashes which is strange, so I'm assuming that each one of the lovely ladies garners about a million an episode from the Bravo bank vault. And though the first episode was somewhat of a snoozefest it looks like this season is going to be a few clowns short of a circus which is nothing short of what we should expect. Tune in! You're in for a bumpy ride. 

Below, season 3 promo.


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