Saturday, August 11, 2012

Do We Really Need More Films About Meryl Going Through Menopause?

Meryl making the 'mischievous face' which she's kind of made her trademark of late.
I don't know about you, but one film I'll be skipping this season is Hope Springs (2012). Not that geriatrics getting it on is like insanely hot, but it basically seems like the plot of It's Complicated (2009) with a little bit of Mamma Mia (2009) and Julie and Julia (2009) through the Diane Keaton film Something's Gotta Give (2003) filter, comes this sweaty turd about nothing at all. Two Oscar winners in the cast, some of our most serious thespians, and they are choosing material called Hope Springs, which by the way sounds like a rehab center.
And why is it that something like menopause is always turned into a romantic comedy where the main female character is just dying for the last great sex of her life before her ovaries shrivel up like a pair of prunes in Death Valley and her vaginal cavity slowly sews itself together? And the male counterpart is always just fine with growing old and not being able to sustain boners anymore, because there's reruns of JAG on everyday, and golfing for him to get seriously competitive about. In the trailer, the Steve Carell character, who is their 'marriage therapist' suggests they have sex more often and the two of them are stunned. 'Sex, what's that? We grew up in an age where we slept in two separate twin size beds that were exactly 6 feet away from each other, and I was wearing petticoats. My fragile constitution cannot handle the violent thought of being fucked by my old wrinkly husband after which he would promptly fall asleep right on top of me rendering me unable to move and snoring right into my ears which I can barely hear out of anyway because I'm so old', says the look on Meryl's face.
Thank you Hollywood to presume that old people have sex with their clothes on because none of us want to handle seeing old saggy boobies.
I love Meryl so much, but she's kind of starting to repeat herself, and because she's in her 60's, a watershed time for any actress, the roles are becoming more predictable. Sure, there will be a Devil Wears Prada (2004) or The Iron Lady (2012) in there somewhere, but let's face it, it looks like Meryl will be retiring soon. I for one am rather tired of the giggly, pseudo-horny, childlike characters she plays that are always rediscovering their sexual awakening at the ripe old age of 63. It really seems like a money project, but with 3 Academy Awards under your belt, an AFI Lifetime Achievement Award, and an acting career that has sprawled along 5 decades, do you even need the money at that point? And I love how they've dusted off Tommy Lee Jones lately. Like he's never played an uppity 'never gonna change my ways' anal-retentive grumpy old man. This is definitely a skip piece. I can already tell the humor is sub-par, the plot is predictable, and the actors working way beneath their respective capabilities. Fail. 

Trailer for the film. Yawn.


1 comment:

Anonymous said...

WOOOOW. I fucking love your WORK!!!!!! SPEAK THAT BEAUTIFUL TRUTH OF YOURS, IT'S TEAR-JERKING! comic woman you are.